The Power of Writing Mentorship for Children: Emotional Growth Through Expression

During my mentorship journey with students and while raising my daughter, I have noticed how children tend to bottle up so many emotions and feelings, while their eyes give way. It takes a lot of prodding until the child feels ‘safe’ enough to open up and share their concerns with a parent. Unknowingly, during this process, children tend to nurture negative self-beliefs that tend to pull them down, leaving parents quite distraught that, despite their best efforts, their child feels otherwise.

Common negative self-beliefs that children harbour

Some common negative self-beliefs that usually crop up if a parent/ a friend/ a sibling/ a teacher has said something knowingly or unknowingly and intentionally or unintentionally:

• My parents don’t love me as much as they love my younger sibling
• I’m not good at arts and crafts
• I’m not good at studies
• I’m dumb
• I’m not good enough
• I’m a scardy cat
• I’m not smart
• I’m not pretty
• I’m not good at ____ (and the list goes on.)

The seeds of negative self-beliefs are planted in fragile minds when, as parents, we unknowingly or knowingly say something to our children. More importantly, since children observe us, if we’re harsh on ourselves and constantly put ourselves down during times of crisis, our children will imbibe that trait too.

Parents are humans too, and despite the best of our abilities, we are bound to have slip-ups. We have to remember that, as parents and children, we are a work in progress.

Why I mentor young children

I’ve been a working parent too, and now that I work closely with children as a mentor, I want to lend a hand to parents so they’re not alone on their journey. That they need not feel guilty for not being able to devote enough time to their children. It is not the number of hours, but even short, consistent quality time is good for them. Yes, a child may think even a devoted number of minutes/ hours isn’t enough, but as parents, we can safely set boundaries guilt-free as we have to strike a balance; else, we’ll run the risk of going overboard.

The Optimistic Octopus

During one of my mentorship journeys, I worked with Chehak, a 5th-grade student, on dealing with a bad day. If you notice, we did not write it as a ‘bad day’, instead we called them ‘slightly rough days’ – we discussed what we could do to deal with such days that don’t go as per our expectations.  

We discussed that one rough day doesn’t mean we’re not good enough or that our lives aren’t good; that’s when we remember our ‘Optimistic Octopus’. Please note, this is inspired by Positively Present’s artwork ‘The Optimistic Octopus’. I really admire how the artist Dani DiPirro weaves art and creativity into everyday life, making things approachable, doable, and reachable. Her art is restorative, allowing each of us to approach our daily challenges at our own pace, without a sense of rush.

Since children love such animals, I decided to use Dani’s ‘Optimistic Octopus’ in one of my sessions, and we created our own version. The octopus with eight arms is a gentle reminder on days we feel overwhelmed, and we wish we had extra hands or helping hands. And all we have to do is look inward and take stock of what we can do to restore calm to our lives.

8 ways to shift your mindset:

1. Be thankful and grateful daily – a simple act of gratitude can help shift the focus from a rough day.
2. Respect yourself even on hard days – no indulging in self-pity – “I’m so dumb, no self-pity, it will only pull us down.
3. Be kind to yourself – no blaming self “I’m not as good as her/ him” … instead rewire the thought as “It’s okay, I’m learning”.
4. Write your daily victory checklist – learn to celebrate small wins – every small action in the right direction is a victory – like completing your homework, going to school, eating your school lunch and not wasting food are a good start.
5. Spend time doing what you love – art, doodling, playing with your cars or dolls, all count.
6. Be stronger than your excuses – don’t let excuses such as ‘not today’, ‘Monday onwards…’ overwrite your mind. Begin now to make that positive change.
7. Be solution-focused – when things don’t go as planned, accept the problem and focus on solutions. No blame game on anyone, admit you messed up and let’s get moving ahead.
8. Take a break, rest, and enjoy – take one day of the week to just laze, read a book, colour, sleep in late, or have a favourite meal prepared by your parent.

How mentorship helps children

At The Write Compass, I work with children on several concepts based on NLP and Art therapy techniques, using writing as a primary tool. We work on several art and craft projects, and general knowledge.

These may look very simple today, but with consistent effort, we work with the children to help them start looking at the positives, acknowledge that it is a rough day (not a bad day), and help them look within for support rather than rely on social media.

If you’re looking for mentorship for your child(ren), let’s connect.

I usually work with children in Grades 2–6 in our W.I.N.G.S Program. We have offline sessions in Noida. For those living in other cities, we can consider online sessions. We usually have a short reading and writing ‘test’ as part of the screening process for our mentorship program.

For older children, Grade 7 and 8 onwards, I run a dedicated 6 Month Writing Mentorship Program, where I handhold the child in writing, critical thinking, and a solution-oriented approach.

My mentorship programs are also open to adults – parents, working/retired professionals, homemakers – let’s connect if you’re keen to explore writing as a tool of self-expression, restart or shift career paths, or just keep your love for learning going. Let’s connect over a Discovery Call and chalk your path with The Write Compass.