Water, Sunlight, and KPI Pressure: The Garden Drama Unfolds

I learn a lot from my plants every single day. Every morning, as I sit down with my morning tea, my plants and I sit in amiable silence, sharing lessons from life. One day, it struck me: If plants had to undergo an appraisal system, and we had to review and grade them in order of performance and productivity, how would it be? Here’s a short story of a quarterly appraisal of the flowering plants in a popular garden. I hope this little satirical (fictional) story inspired by what my plants have taught me over the months will leave my readers with enough food for thought and plant the seed for a positive change.

So, the dreaded day of every quarter had arrived. The Gardener-in-Chief would visit the garden to review all the plants. All the plants, flowering and non-flowering, dreaded this. It was when they would be ranked based on how well they performed in the last quarter, based on their growth, potential, ability to outshine others and increase in footfalls in the much-coveted garden. People came from far and away to picnic and pose for selfies with the flowers and plants.

The plants got so worried that they almost forgot why they were there in the first place—to bloom, grow, climb and rise high, help clean up the air, make the soil rich and hold it, and be an integral part of nature’s ecosystem for the birds, rabbits and insects. The higher purpose was all buried in worry with the upcoming Gardener-in-Chief’s quarterly review.

The sun was up and shining, and the flowers were blooming. Some plants even tried to shed their dried leaves and flowers before the caretaker came to clean up the garden, but they couldn’t. They wanted to put up their Sunday best, but they could not fast-forward something that was not meant to happen before time.

The Gardener-in-Chief wore a black suit, white shirt, and blue tie. He put down his briefcase and took a seat at the garden table. He was assisted by junior and associate gardeners, all dressed in formal shirts, ties, and trousers. The Gardener-in-Chief opened his laptop and started looking up at each plant individually while reviewing their scores.

In consultation with his associates, he started calling out the names of the plants. The plants shuddered till their roots. As the roll call continued, with the markings and scorings for each plant, it was the turn of the Sunflower.

“Sunflower…” he began, “It has been observed that you were not in your spirits in December and January. We didn’t see much of your presence in the garden. Regarding customer delight, I’ll have to give you a two.” “But…but, I’m not supposed to bloom in the winters!” cried out a distraught Sunflower.

The Gardener-in-Chief, ignoring the Sunflower’s feeble protest, continued to look into his laptop and fervently typed his remarks for the Sunflower while his team of associates shared files for each plant and inputs that were not too audible to the other plants.

Then came Alamanda’s turn… “You seem to be supporting others way too much, plus you like to climb fast and reach for the sun. I’ll give you a 5. And with your leaves shedding in the winters, you look terrible, almost non-existent. I’ll deduct 2 points from your overall score,” said the Gardener-in-Chief.

“Petunia!! ” said the Gardener-in-Chief in a gruff voice. “Yes, sir?” responded the flower in a weak tone. It was April, and this winter flower was already wilting away, yet it was making all the efforts to bloom with whatever little strength it had.

The Gardener-in-Chief continued, “You put on a wonderful display in the winter; we’re happy to see your contribution to our garden in the winter, but what I see today is not up to the mark. I expect that despite all odds, you bloom your best.”

“But..but…”, while Petunia tried to speak, the Gardener-in-Chief made the final markings “, I’ll give you a 3 as your current state is not up to the mark”, and he shut his laptop and stormed out of the garden with his associates and kept grumbling at them.

“The plants in your garden are not up to the mark. You need to push harder to get the results; I need numbers, numbers! Otherwise, all your appraisals and bonuses will see a dip. Make sure to nip all the bright, optimistic and creative thinking plants at the bud. We don’t want creativity at work, we want to stick to rules that have been working for us. And those who haven’t scored well, reduce their share of sunlight, fertilizers and water. They must be motivated to do their best and score a 10/10; only then will they get their deserving share of sunlight, fertilizers and water.”

The Gardener-in-Chief continued, “And make them go through training. I want each plant to learn to be the same way so that our growth metrics and ticket sales revenues look good. Take a call for plants that don’t show up all year round and are not productive throughout the year.”

There was pin-drop silence once the Gardener-in-Chief and his associates left the garden. The Sunflower, Allamanda, and Petunia were totally demotivated. They overheard the Gardener-in-Chief’s comments to her associates. Some plants were worried that the new saplings growing around them needed their fair share of fertilizers, sunshine and water, else it would drain out the resources of the parent plants.

The Sunflower’s teardrop landed on the soil. Allamanda didn’t know how to let off its grip from the fence and nets that supported it, and the Petunia breathed feebly, coughing, knowing very well that its time was up as the harsh summers had set in.

For all the months that the Petunia bloomed, it had no value as it was judged and graded based on what it looked like today. Its strengths were overlooked just for a recent memory that overshadowed all the last quarter’s best blooming performance.

The Sunflower shines best in the harshest of the sun; it’s not meant to bloom in the winter. Its strength lies in the summer.

The Allamanda was ridiculed for being a creeper. It is not a parasite. It was strong and sturdy and covered the area with its leaves, flowers, and stems, creating cooling foliage for the summer and providing food to hummingbirds who drank nectar from its yellow bell flowers.

The bloomed flowers showcased their strengths and weaknesses but were judged mostly for their weakness. We cannot expect summer flowers to bloom in winter and winter flowers to bloom in summer. Each flowering plant brought with it its fair share of strengths.

The Allamanda would beautifully embrace the bougainvillea plant so that the Gardener-in-Chief’s associates wouldn’t get hurt with its thorns, but no heed was taken. Sunflower seeds are food for the parrots that feed on them, keeping a crucial ecosystem alive; even this strength of the Sunflower was overlooked.

The Gardener-in-Chief and his associates expected the flowers to bloom in silos and that external factors such as the sun, wind, insects, birds and water had no role to play.

While they sat there, all demotivated, across the river, their good old friends, the Fish from the stream and the Elephant from the nearby forest, came to check on their friends from the garden. They were concerned with the shrouded flowering plants in the garden and enquired. Upon learning the Gardener-in-Chief’s comments, the Fish replied, “Believe it or not, but the Elephant and I were failed and marked a big zero in our annual appraisal!”

The plants were alarmed. Why would someone fail the Fish, an excellent swimmer who could swim with the currents, and the Elephant, which could wade through neck-deep grass and carry heavy logs?

“Who would do just a thing and why?” asked the Sunflower.

The Elephant replied sadly, “Well, we were asked to climb a tree by the Monkey-in-Charge in our forest!”